Life, Love, Marriage, Relationships

Relationships: Why Should You Wait For Marriage In Your Early Twenties?

While I was searching for a photo for this post, I saw two toddlers dressed up like they were going to  get married. Which leads me to the question, how young is too young? I know our brains keep developing well into our twenties but is that a deciding factor on whether or not we should get married young? If our brains are fully developed or not? I know back in my grandma’s day (whenever that is because her age is a secret she will take with her to the grave) They used to get married really young. My grandma even got married at 19. Why is marrying young shunned upon in modern society?

I’m engaged and I’ve heard a woman tell me to “Wait, don’t rush”. I’m rushing because I’m 23 and I should wait. What exactly is it that I’m waiting for?

I’m not saying EVERYONE thinks young people shouldn’t get married although, its on the list of things some OLDER people think younger people shouldn’t be able to do. Such as:

1. Have children
2. Quit School to work full time/ Pursue a dream
3. Get Married

I’m no parent, but I am apart of the youth. I do agree that with certain young adults certain life changing events will be occur with those who aren’t ready yet. Yet, I find it odd when some one sees my engagement ring and makes a remark like “You’re engaged? You’re so young!”. I’m also living on my own, paying my own bills, and working my butt off. So age wise yes I’m young but I have the responsibilities of a mature adult. Don’t even get me started on what I’ve been through trying to get health insurance and the repairs at my house fixed by my land lord. My best friend got married young. He received the same comments I have, but what’s the real issue here?

Often adults think that people my age (early twenties) have so many fantastic things in store waiting for them. Marriage in itself is fantastic to me. Finding your soul mate, making that vow to live and die together, creating a future for a happy life. Granted, there’s going to be some storms along the way but life is always a swift wind away from knocking you down in general. Marriage as well as children and your career goals are merely an extension of ones self. Everyone does not have the same mental/physical/financial capacity to handle certain things in a mature manner. But I do. I also know my best friend does. He is married, with kids, a house, a career and happy. He’s 22. So before most adults scorn the youth for making a “grown up” decision like getting married, maybe they should look at other factors besides age. Like the individual.

It may be true that younger people have the highest divorce rate, but that doesn’t apply to the percentage of young people that do have successful marriages. Its often said that at this age you don’t know what you want. How would adults know that? I understand most of them are trying to make sure their children make the right decisions but blocking ones decision to honestly honor and cherish some one for a lifetime isn’t a decision people should worry about (for some of us).

What I’m trying to say is that it’s not impossible for two people who have faith in their love and strength within a relationship to be successful at marriage. It can be done.


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